Advice is SEVERELY NEEDED: I like two guys and they both have girlfriends

>they both have girlfriends

keep off

It's not worth it. I've been cheated on multiple times. Don't be that person. There will be plenty of other guys.

Quote from suprememadisyn

That's my number one priority. I don't want to be THAT girl.

Then don't BE that girl.. -_-

@OP

maybe you should drop the

"if you weren't going out with x, would you go out with me line" to get your answer to your question

Quote from selfmate

@OP

maybe you should drop the

"if you weren't going out with x, would you go out with me line" to get your answer to your question

i think it would be better for OP just to leave it where it is and move on.

Quote from VioletParr

i think it would be better for OP just to leave it where it is and move on.

that might be true but if that was all it was then I'm sure the OP's friend would've already said that no?

I mean everyone's giving her the they have GFs move on line but wouldn't that be the most obvious answer and yet she still asks it here so I'm giving her a slightly different opinion

(not that I would ask her to cheat but merely to have an answer to her question)

it might give her either hope or closure depending on the answers

Bruh

You have doubts while talking about it and I can see that you are not the kind of person who would be able to not care at all. You might be feeling hot headed right now and the time you spend with them might be exciting but I doubt it would end well for you even if you end up having an affair and you would end up feeling like trash once the feeling of being drunk on those guys passes (and it will pass)

don’t make a move on someone else’s guy, just leave them alone

you’ll find your person eventually, don’t force it alright? especially since it might just be an rush of attraction right now, but might fade later.

Go for a guy who won’t treat you as a second choice, don’t be the rebound chick...

Quote from suprememadisyn

Girl, I am far from that. Im just trying to know should I wait but not wait? I really dont know what to do but I know for fact that is far from what I want to do or be. My actions affect others and not just me. That would be incredibly selfish.

You go girl but tbh If my sister brought home one of her friends I'd just see her as one of my sisters dumb friends lmao not calling you dumb though just she's my sisters friend so.. This is hard to explain lmao like my sisters friend is my friend but not really lmao too bad it's not like that scene from Ginny & Georgia haha

Quote from suprememadisyn

Girl, I am far from that. Im just trying to know should I wait but not wait? I really dont know what to do but I know for fact that is far from what I want to do or be. My actions affect others and not just me. That would be incredibly selfish.

please. and i cannot emphasize this enough. PLEASE don't wait on someone, especially when they're dating someone else. i know i'm a random ass stranger on the internet but from the bottom of my heart, i really mean this- just move on. easier said than done but you cannot waste your life away on what if's. no matter how another convo goes etc.

if it's meant to happen it will happen it will happen. do not force it, because if you do, karma will force someone out of your life too.

you have so much life left. please do not waste it away.

Quote from suprememadisyn

Mhmm here's the thing. I like this one a lot and this would totally help but I know damn well I would not like it if another woman said some shit like this to my man but then again, this would help me figure out if I should wait and date or not or just get completely over them. So, ill consider it depending on the conversation at hand.

and with all due respect my friend since you already knew that prior to coming here i assume thus you wanted a different perspective so I suggested my suggestion...

nothing is me saying go cheat but merely go get your answer to your question...that way it gives you some element of knowledge and closure (maybe lol)

now of course no person would want another person to hit on their gf/bf but in life that might not be possible one has to rely on the honesty and integrity of one's chosen partner to defuse that situation

Ohh I remember you... Glad to see you back.

Btw just move on. You're just overthinking I guess.

Quote from suprememadisyn

Well, I wanted to hear all perspectives no matter the answer and the suggestion was great! I appreciate it.

I know what you mean. it's not ideal but it would certainly give me the answer that I'm looking for. I wish this was so much easier. Them having girlfriends seriously wasn't what I wanted. it happened though and now I'm just stuck with these feelings I'm not supposed to feel.

its crazy because I dropped a mirror and carter said that gives me bad luck. The bad luck just settled in. like what are the odds but of the guys, I'm into have girlfriends? like one okay but two?

life is unfair my friend have you heard this story that I've told here before:

There was this girl who dreamed of finding the one - Mr Perfect if you will and set forth beaming with hope. She crossed a bridge and an old man fishing asked what she was doing and she replied that she was going forth to the world to find Mr Perfect.

A few years later this girl comes back across the bridge with sadness and dejection in her eyes and the old man fishing remembers her and asks hey did you find Mr Perfect and she replied yes I found him. The old man asks "and?" the girl replies "I found him but he was looking for Miss Perfect"

Quote from suprememadisyn

oof, its the second sentence for me. That hit. Could definitely be a lust thing that I get over. I feel like Carter will if anything. I feel that will fade but Kent has me feeling a way that only certain guys could make me feel but you're right... I wouldn't want to force it or be the rebound. Thank you!

i hope this helped! Try to choose something you won’t regret, okie? Stay happy hun~

Quote from suprememadisyn

Hi guys, I'm in a predicament that I NEVER thought id be in and I'm totally clueless on what to do. My friends give shit advice so I hope this helps

Backstory on Carter

Backstory: I started working at my current job 4 months ago. Now I'm the "Don't mix business with pleasure type" so yeah I noticed that a few of my male peers were attractive but I always kept it at a level. Over time I developed a friendship with them where I can't even see them in that way. One, in particular, has a sister that works there. I befriended her and some nights shed bring me home. Were going to call them " Kristin" and "Carter". They share a car so if he got off early, he'd go home and come back to pick us up after our shift ends sometimes. He works mornings and we (Kirstin and me) close on most days. He's pretty cool but he keeps to himself and we talk every once in a while. I had a dream about him that was slightly intimate but I never paid much attention since I didn't like him. Then, Id say February is when me and him starting talking more and growing closer. That same month a new girl started working there in late February. Were going to call her Nicki. She is pretty cool as well. So two to three weeks ago she tells me she's going on a date after work telling me how they just became official after talking for 2 weeks (I think) something like that. Then the next day, I see her buddy buddy with Carter and I'm like "huh, but she has a boyfriend so can't be" I forgot what Carter did that day but I started just looking at him differently through our conversations for the next couple of days growing interested in him. Then one night after closing I'm getting a ride from some other coworkers since Kirstin was busy. We leave the store together and there is Carter in the car with Nicki and I'm like "WTF, he's the guy"

Backstory on Kent

So, this is a completely different story. I'm going to tell you guys about another guy that I also like but I've been interested in him for 3 months, so since January. He DOES NOT work at our job. We're calling this guy "Kent". He works at the supermarket next door like it's literally 3 seconds away from my job. I would go in and see him but every time I walked in the store he would be heading to the back of it. So I just accepted that we were never going to speak. Then 2 weeks ago, I come in the store and of course, he goes to the back as always but then he comes back out and it was my time to say something, so I did. I asked him to recommend some microwavable TV dinner Macroonis. He shows it and then I say something awkward to him and leave. (not gonna say what it was, but it was nothing related to me liking him). I try the macaroni and it tasted great! So I go back the next day and see him and tell him how it was. Then, I go to the freezer aisle and get a different mac & cheese that I tried before I ever spoke to him. I'm walking to the cashier and he comes walking past then stops me to say "that taste good, you're going to like it" so I tell him " I already did, Gabe (another worker there that I know recommended it). he says "oh, Gabe yeah I know him" then I go pay to leave.

Everything thing that I'm going to state from this instance happened last week.

Wednesday

I go to Kent's job. There was a line due to covid. Kent was working the front (finally) as I get to the front of the line he sees me, says hi, and asked me if I worked next door and I say yes. I told him I'm here to get the usual. I buy the mac and cheese and as I'm leaving he tells me I should try another macaroni flavor that's really good next time I come. I ask to him to take off his mask to see if he was still cute with it off and he totally was. I say mhm and then ask him what time he gets off and he tells me 12:00. That explains why I have never seen him leave since the latest my job ends is 11:30.

Thursday

So, I'm at work on Thursday and Carter is just getting off work. As soon as that happens my manager tells me to go on break. So we're talking and I asked how would you like to be approached by a girl. he answers then says " why do you ask," I tell him I want to talk to Kent. So I convince him to come with me. Long story short I failed. Couldn't even talk to the guy due to my social anxiety since a lot of other people were around while I wanted to talk to him and I felt it would be inappropriate. We just walk in the same aisle twice, buy something, then leave. Carter consoles me and says just go back tomorrow. Carter starts telling me how he sees Kent pushing carts outside so maybe I could talk to him then. Later that night, I go outside and see him pushing carts. I see a trader joes one and let's just say the cart did its own thing and charged at Kent LOL. I say sorry and go back inside.

Friday

I take Carter's advice and go to Kent's job during my break as always. I walk up to Kent and ask him the name of the macaroni he recommended on Thursday. I just asked him the name and he says ill show you instead. I was pretty happy not gonna lie. I apologized for pushing the cart at him, he says it's all good. We get to the macaroni and he tells me that it's not even here. I was just gonna get something else but he insists on going in the back and looking for me. He tells me to wait for him. I, of course, don't wait since I see my friend that works there and walk away. he comes out 5 minutes looking for me. I tell him just to wait.

Friday

Jo (the friend that works there) asks who I'm speaking to and I say Kent. She said, " you know Kent?". I responded saying yeah somewhat. She proceeds to say he's a really nice guy and I say "Yeah, and a cute one". She agrees and as he walks over she says "Kent, you're a cute one". He hands the macaroni to me and he said if I don't like it to not come back because he's that sure I 'l like it. I say I hope so since I'm getting tired of the other mac and cheese. I tell him mac & cheese and Pizza are the only things I get there and he said "literally me" I told him how the one pizza I bought had tomatoes on it and it wasn't really good. He said, "you probably thought it was pepperoni, I did the same thing". I said that's literally what happened. We laugh and walk away from Jo. I ask him how old he was and he tells me. As he was asking me how old am I, at the same time I told him I thought he was cute. He says thank you and then calls me pretty. So, I'm thinking so far this is going great. So, I ask are you single? then this man literally said, "no, she actually works here too". In my head, I was like wtf then why call me pretty? I tell him that I will catch him when he's single and he said "yeah, do that". Anywho I see Jo and tell her what happened. She tells me she knew and that she was just about to tell me he had one then he came over and that when we walked away from that she wanted to stop me so bad from making a move. She tells me they've been dating a couple of months like 3-4 then hugs me and I leave. Theres one more Kevin story from this night but I don't think its that serious.

Saturday

I got off early and so did Carter. He got off at 5:30 and me at 4. We both ended up not leaving at those times. Im working with his girlfriend. I tell her how I'm going to ask Carter for a ride. She didn't seem phased by it so I ask him. He repeatedly says no due to plans and that I'm leaving at 7 and him at 6 so he's not going to wait. What does he end up doing? Literally staying till 7:35. We go into his car and I offer to get him Rita's since he told me he never had a Gelati. We go and end up talking for 2 hours outside my house. Yall I even got butterflies for a second during one of our convos. There was a lot of staring at each other. Long pauses. We were examining each other's lips at one point. I was trying to get his phone from him so a lot of touching but nothing too far. I even got him to admit that he waited for me. He was even comparing himself to my type of guy without realizing it, I think.

We got off early but his girlfriend didn't and she was telling him to come to pick her up and you can just tell he didn't want to leave. She had to text him again. He told me that he was just going to take me with lol. I didn't feel like third-wheeling so I just left LMAOOO

So thoughts??? Do any of these guys feel the same about me from what yall heard so far? Should I wait or move on? I don't want to look too much into it since they BOTH have girlfriends but I feel something with the both of them. I could just be overthinking it. It doesn't matter anyway since I'm not actively trying to home wreck either relationship but I genuinely have no clue on what to do. I'm going to keep seeing both of them and talk to them, I just don't want to overstep. it's hard though. I like Kent more but Carter and I are way closer. Kent already knows I like him whereas Carter doesn't.

* Yall I just wanted to know by the interactions with them if I should wait or try my best to move on not if I should homewreck or anythingz1

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Uhm just keep your hands to yourself. As long as they're still in a relationship it isn't your business to change that

Be a decent human being

Stay away. Avoid trouble and stress for yourself.

Quote from suprememadisyn

I just seen the thread right now. My question is: does changing the font mean anything? You did this same thing while telling the story in your Mr. Perect thread. It cant be a coincidence.

i've copied and pasted this from my intro thread

that's where i posted the story initially...

i think i wrote it in word or notepad before copying it to akp hence the colour change lol

If they have girlfriends then I'm sorry but it doesn't matter if you like them because they are taken

Quote from just-a-melon

It's not worth it. I've been cheated on multiple times. Don't be that person. There will be plenty of other guys.

I am soo sorry, that seems so sad, hopefully you got revenge on them