About idols apologizing for problematic things they did...

if its things like slutshaming or racism than no

"But then, since they still get hate for it, what do fans even want these idols to do about it 10 years later? Apologize again? "

They're not fans, just haters. And I believe a fan can turn into a hater, so if they're still mad at something their idol did years ago (I'm mostly referring to "forgivable" stuff, not racism, se**al assault, or anything of the sort), they're are haters.

imo people that treat like others can't learn from their mistakes can't learn from their own and grow from their past actions

Quote from hueningkaiskai

if its things like slutshaming or racism than no

btw theres a thin line between ignorance and racism

second chances should be given if u apologized properly and avoid repeating the same mistakes again

Quote from icyruios

I was like confused thinking why u talking to yourself

just wanted to expand a bit lol

There's some things that can't really be resolved by just an apology.

And I don't think bullying is a mistake you may have done because you are young. You have to be a shitty person to bully someone. Bullying is not a thing that happened once, but repetedly, if something is done repetedly you can't call that a mistake anymore. Being young doesn't excuse everything.

I like to believe that people can change and trying to be a better person after making mistakes. It doesn't matter If it's people I like or others. I'm not a moral judge to determinate who is being genuine and who doesn't. It's on their own and how they will behave in the future that will show that.

All we can do is giving at least an opportunity, because It was important for me to grow when it was given to me after I was problematic in the past.

What's the point in apologizing if people are not ready to accept the apology? There's none. It's rigged from the start. If anything, it shows people are hypocrites.

It really depends on the 'subject matter' and how remorseful the idol is.

Take Onew's case for example, that is something that definitely should be let go for the facts and things surrounding it.

If it's something like racism or bullying your other idol members, yeah that I'm not so sure about.

Quote from pinky-hwi

Ok what if said idol apologized for a 1-time thing, and it was really bad. Say it was 8 years ago, and they've already made up for their mistakes and improved themselves for the better. Would you be willing to let something like this go?

It depend of what is the one time thing. I'm fine as long as there's no victims.

And if there's a victim of this one time thing, if the victim accept the apology then I'm no one to judge. But if the victim doesn't accept the apology then again it depend of what was the "mistake".

idk

how it is in the west

Quote from quark12395

My issue with kpop fans specifically refusing to acknowledge that people can apologize and learn from their mistakes is that the ones who damn idols they hate for being problematic, are the same ones who turn around and do shit just as bad to people they hate.

Of course, it's always the worst people who judge others the most harshly.

So long as someone hasn’t done something actually criminal, they deserve to be given the chance to prove that their behaviour or attitude has changed.

I feel like - *in general* - a lot of the people who don’t feel this way are often fairly young and don’t realise quite how much/how many times they are going to change through life, or how easy it is to do stupid things you regret that are otherwise totally out of character.

Ok but I'm not forced to forgive anyone

Quote from pinky-hwi

Hmm interesting take. I agree it depends case by case.

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Also a bit off topic but I love your sig and your aesthetic as a whole

Yeah there is no cookie cutter answer for things like this as there are too many variables. An idol can apologize all they want but do they mean it? Some things an apology can't fix in the eyes of the public, which we even see with Western stars.

Quote from Alex_Murphy

What's the point in apologizing if people are not ready to accept the apology? There's none. It's rigged from the start. If anything, it shows people are hypocrites.

The point of asking for apology is to show you are regretful

People accepting your apologies was never a requirement to apologize

Quote from Icaro_Ribeiro

The point of asking for apology is to show you are regretful

People accepting your apologies was never a requirement to apologize

What's the point in showing you are regretful if people don't care?

I think the moral obligation should go both ways.

Quote from Alex_Murphy

What's the point in showing you are regretful if people don't care?

I think the moral obligation should go both ways.

Good thing you are wrong

Quote from Icaro_Ribeiro

Good thing you are wrong

Wow, I'm so convinced. What a great debater you are. Okay.

Quote from pinky-hwi

So what if they're regretful, and still people never get over it and continue to hate them for it?

The hated person will need to live with it, that's nothing to be done. That's a point of being a public person that sucks hard. I can only state in what I believe and my advices:

I advice people who hates public persons to just stop supporting them in any way AKA cancelling them for good. I cancelled many singers myself and still hating them to date, just avoid sending hate messages on SNS is not good whether the person is guilty or not

Quote from Alex_Murphy

Wow, I'm so convinced. What a great debater you are. Okay.

Thanks, I'm aware of that

I think everybody should be given a chance to redeem themselves and change for the better. Anything less wouldn't be humane.

Those people don't really want to make a positive change in the world, they only want to look cool fighting for the good cause.

If you actually do care about making a positive chsnge6, you'd feel proud of people who acknowledge their mistakes and better themselves. If you don't care about their apology and growth then maybe you're just a hateful narcissist.

Of course I'm not talking about serious issues like committing actual crimes (sexual harassment, assault, murder etc)

well ive said many stupid things a few years ago and now i laugh about it - im still young but ive matured, educated myself on many topics and became more sympathetic. in my opinion it depends on how big the problem is, sometimes an apology isnt enough, but overall idols are also humans, theyre being watched all the time, so its good to be objective. ive seen someone make a whole ass tiktok about everything some kpop groups have done and for me its just ridiculous, hold your faves accountable and move on, enjoy the music, youre not their mother

Shindong’s fat shaming comments. It was years ago and he apologised but it still gets brought up. It pisses me off. Why can’t fans leave things in the past? The same with Siwon’s anti gay sentiments. It seems to me double standards, when it’s a group like SJ, everybody jumps on the hate bandwagon, but when it’s a more popular group people run to their defence if they cause a misdemeanour. Hypocrites!

if they did something really bad its not enough to just say sorry. they should face some consequences. its so easy to say sorry you don't even have to mean it. sorry doesn't fix real problems

Depends on the crime. Like violence rape or anything physical probably never.

But if it’s ideas or things they’ve said (even if it’s bigoted) if it’s been a long enough time and they haven’t repeated it I move on. That’s kind of the whole point of educating people: to be better.

If you’re gonna keep bringing up the past what’s the incentive for people to be better?

Quote from Cold_Wave

if they did something really bad its not enough to just say sorry. they should face some consequences. its so easy to say sorry you don't even have to mean it. sorry doesn't fix real problems

Well I hardly think someone calling girls fat is something serious but fans over exaggerate it. If it’s something more serious like Kangin’s drink driving then that’s problematic and inexcusable even with an apology. I’ve still seen fans defending him over that considering he’d done it before. Idols just need to be more aware of their actions then an apology wouldn’t be necessary.

Fans don’t have to accept the idols apology or forgive them

I believe that if you truly repent, you have a chance to be forgiven. However, depending on the size of the mistake you need to pay in some way for your attitudes

each situation depends on the circumstances

each action depends on the severity of the consequences not the action itself...

lets say an idol bullied someone and the victim accepted such apology and no harm was done ?

lets say an idol bullied someone and such victim committed suicide...

both were bullying issues but the consequence of such bullying is different...

in order to determine the forgivableness of someone should we not first look at fhe consequence of such action first?

For smaller things:

If it's over a year old, and I have clearly changed the way I think and behave when it comes to that particular subject, then if you can't let it go and move on (notice how I didn't say "forgive", that's something different), you have a problem with me that you need to sort out for yourself.

For bigger things (open sexism, racism, sexual assault/harassment, etc.):

Nah.