Is child abuse normalised in society?

    Yes.

    A lot of parents care more about "raising a child with both parents" instead of getting their kids out of a fucked up environment and starting a better life.

    My mum is like that. Its more important for her that "her kids have a dad" than her kids not growing up to be fucked up.

    Often thats also just an excuse because they are afriad to start on their own and are dependent on their abusive partner.

    Its almost impossible that no outside party gets to know about it because its so obvious at some point. But people mostly dont even know what to do and decide its the affected families business first and foremost. So in a way all of society knows, but most cases never get dealt with. And then it becomes a neverending vicious circle.

    For a child thats the kind of scars that will never ever disappear until the day we die.

    You can get over certain stuff if they happened in your later years. But if you live in an environment like this from your earliest years of development you are basically fucked.


    Also literal beatings are being seen as justified measures because they are quick and seen as effective. In reality they just dont fucking know how to tackle the issue in depth, find appropriate measures and emotional reactions and take their time and teach their kinds life lessons in a humanly way.

    I strongly believe that if your kid isnt a psychopath or something and you have had built up a strong emotional connection with your child its practically impossible to lose control of them to the point where you have to resort to physical and mental violence. If you had nurtured a trusting relationship with your child and if they maybe even see you as their friend, they will listen to you in the end no matter what (if your worldview is completely off then maybe not but thats another case).

    And not every mistake should be seen as the end of the world. If you never make a mistake in your life and if you never fall, then you will never learn good from bad, right from wrong and you wont be able to grow.

    Abuse is still normalised because a mindset like that still isnt even close to being the norm. A lot of parents still think they need to guide their kids the harsh way because the "real world is even harsher" and a lot of parents even think they basically own their kids.

  • AllKill VIP
    • Official Post

    It's generally not considered normal, but different societies have a different perspective on where to draw the line. Some societies think it's okay to use physical punishment as a way to discipline children. I believe that used to be the case even in the United States, but things eventually changed.

    I'm late to the party but here's my two cents for those who care...


    The first thing to ask is what is child abuse - not just the definition but context and the limits of mere discipline v abuse


    There are examples of a simple slap on the hand is that abuse - what about a slap on the buttocks? even a time out could be considered abuse. There are obvious examples such as beting your kid with a belt until they bleed but what of hte non-obvious ones? what about the non-physical types of abuse - the shouting the demeaning etc? one person's interpretation of abuse may be different to anothers


    we also need to look at the context of the abuse, the social economic factors, the ethnicity and background of the parents, societal values with regards too discipline - Singapore had the cane at school so canings were normalised at one point thus could that be considered abuse if it was government sanctioned?


    Then we need to look at how normal is it (given your question of it being normalised) - how much abuse is going on in society - which society do we define - is it your household? the neighbourhood? state level? country level? the whole world


    Just some thoughts

    Depends, what do people see as child abuse? To me, hitting a kid with a belt definitely raises an alarm, while some people dismiss that. I’ve seen some people say piercing a baby’s ears is child abuse too, so a lot of different views I guess

    Kids barely get support or are believed. A parent verbally abusing, physically and sexually assaulting their own child is completely fine as they pay for their food and clothing and must love them deep down. Society turns a blind eye and Gaslights the kid if they try to speak up so yes it is normalised.


    Asian countries and bollywood glorify being parents and respecting elders to a point where those fkrs can stab you then people will say your overreacting and we're lucky to get a blessing in a permanent form. They are using religion and skewing it to make their lives better.

    Desbundar

  • AllKill VIP

    Hitting a child is extremely stigmatised in my country thankfully. Any type of physical “discipline” is frowned upon. My mom has slapped me twice in my whole life and when I told my friends they were shocked because that’s not something a parent should ever EVER do according to people here. Laying a hand on a child is illegal so when my mom slapped me she actually broke the law. Verbal abuse also have pretty strict laws but it’s harder to identify ofc.


    My aunt has two small children right now and she and her husband really goes out of their way to talk and explain to them what they did wrong, more so than I’ve seen any other parents do. Most parents ofc tries but will at times just tell their kids to “stop that” and that they aren’t allowed to do things without giving a real reason why, you’re just supposed to listen. She thinks explaining to them why is both more effective as they learn more from it but it’s also partly about respect. Sometimes I think adults forget that children are their own people. They have their own identities and just dragging them around telling them what to do and what not without really communicating with them isn’t how you treat another person.

    Quote from Serendipity2000

    Kids barely get support or are believed. A parent verbally abusing, physically and sexually assaulting their own child is completely fine as they pay for their food and clothing and must love them deep down. Society turns a blind eye and Gaslights the kid if they try to speak up so yes it is normalised.


    Asian countries and bollywood glorify being parents and respecting elders to a point where those fkrs can stab you then people will say your overreacting and we're lucky to get a blessing in a permanent form. They are using religion and skewing it to make their lives better.

    "My mother hates me and abuses me"

    "Don't be silly Jeff. No one loves you as much as your mother. She gave birth to you and everything she does to you is out of love. Don't say such horrible things about her."

    Jeff feels guilty and never speaks out about his abuse again. He becomes depressed and later commits suicide.

    My definition of child abuse is, hitting and causing injury to a kid to vent your anger , stress or when you just feel like it.


    And I think hit to discipline is okay to a certain level. As long as it doesnt cause injury. Because thats how I was raise. And I turned into a human being just fine.


    Kids nowadays are so spoiled and have no manners because parents dont hit to discipline anymore (not all). theres an article couple days back. A father was beaten by 40+ Teenage kids bcs he was standing up for his son who was bullied. The father was hospitalized with a couple of broken bones and ribs.


    What Im trying to say is, sometimes hit to discipline works. It teaches kid to have respect and manners.

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