How do you define parasocial relationships?

For me, the parasocial relationship is when fans think that they are (or can be) close to their idols. I know kpop companies play into it and the idols do the fanservice and address the fans in a particular way that feeds the delusions. They sometimes do livestreams in a certain way or just act so that the fans can keep this fantasy of becoming their bf/gf or friend. That's also one of the reasons why the idols' dating is usually kept secret.

What comes with it is that some fans feel entitled to say what the idols should wear, do or look like. It's almost like they think because they support the idols, they have the right to decide everything or protest if they don't like something.

Addressing your example - I wouldn't say that simply being involved in the idols lives - as in following news about them and their SM regularly, is a parasocial relationship. I agree that it could be called an obsession, if it's an extreme case. But regular fans who are simply following the news about idols or collecting everything do nothing wrong, I think.

You could actually say that those fans who feel the need to attack other fandoms, defend every little thing said about their faves and baby their idols are actually parasocial. I haven't seen it myself, but I've heard it happens on twitter a lot.

(And before someone points out - I have commented a few times when I felt someone was attacking my favourite groups, in the past or recently, but only in a few cases when I thought they were in the wrong. Otherwise, I just don't pay attention to it. I also can't imagine going all out to attack other fandoms - I don't even see any fandoms as rivals, because I don't view kpop groups as rivals either, so I don't understand people who do.)

Well, I have my idea of what a parasocial relationship is, but let's consult google: A parasocial relationship is a one-sided emotional connection that a person develops with a media figure they don't know in real life

I would say going by that definition, most of us here are in a parasocial relationship with the groups we follow. I suppose it's all about how far you take it because at a point it does become an unhealthy obsession. As long as you have a good amount of self awareness, there's nothing wrong with parasocial relationships I guess. Like I know I'll never actually get to marry Jennie or Karina, but one can hope.

All fans have a parasocial relationship to some degree, it's not reserved just for the overly obsessed or delusional ones. It is a well-researched topic in psychology, and fans of public figures in general fit the definition. Humans will naturally develop some sort of parasocial relationship to celebrities they follow closely, it's not automatically pathological.

In of itself it's not harmful, but there's a scale to this of course and some are a lot more parasocial that others and latch onto celebrities in unhealhy ways.

TBH I hate parasocial relationships and I hate all these companies for feeding into it and making their idols do weird stuff. Saying that I know that all fans have parasocial relationships with their fave groups or idols. I think as long as they're not doing anything weird and aren't spending all their time insulting any other groups then it's ''fine''. Western fans have parasocial relationships but I feel like in K-pop it's a little more severe.

I just don't like it when people just become so mentally deranged and crazy. I feel like a lot of fans need to take a long break from kpop because they make it their whole entire personality and it's so weird.

It’s not just BF/GF stuff.

When it’s not just entertainment any more and what happens to the idol affects your mood IRL. So like if something is happening to your idol maybe good or bad, it personally affects your own happiness/emotions as well.

Like for example if rober pattinson’s movie flops, I don’t really care? I’m a fan of him but like I don’t really care if his films really flop? I just watch the ones I enjoy. Same can be said about any of my western fav singers. I only care if the content they produce can entertain me. Nothing more.

When you’re in a para social relationship you will spend hours on end discussing and fighting for your favs and their up’s and downs become your whole personality like your life depends on it lol.

A lot of Kpop fans on forums are definitely in para social relationships with their idols. Myself included.

Quote from ISaidISaid

It’s not just BF/GF stuff.

When it’s not just entertainment any more and what happens to the idol affects your mood IRL. So like if something is happening to your idol maybe good or bad, it personally affects your own happiness/emotions as well.

Like for example if rober pattinson’s movie flops, I don’t really care? I’m a fan of him but like I don’t really care if his films really flop? I just watch the ones I enjoy. Same can be said about any of my western fav singers. I only care if the content they produce can entertain me. Nothing more.

When you’re in a para social relationship you will spend hours on end discussing and fighting for your favs and their up’s and downs become your whole personality like your life depends on it lol.

A lot of Kpop fans on forums are definitely in para social relationships with their idols. Myself included.

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That's very good point. I didn't think about that, but it's very true.

I see it even on instagram, which apparently is a lot tamer than twitter or other sites. At first I thought that most of it is just dramatic younger fans (who can be dramatic about anything), but adults act like this too - like their whole life depends on what's happening to their groups.

Of course, we as fans care for them and would want them to succeed, but some reactions are too much.

I also had a flashback to how much my life was affected in 2014, when Jessica was removed from SNSD. Thankfully, I hope I'm pass that stage and I no longer react so strongly, but I know the feeling and it wasn't healthy or normal.

doing whatever needs to be done to ensure that the fan keeps swiping that credit card.

Quote from ISaidISaid

It’s not just BF/GF stuff.

When it’s not just entertainment any more and what happens to the idol affects your mood IRL. So like if something is happening to your idol maybe good or bad, it personally affects your own happiness/emotions as well.

Like for example if rober pattinson’s movie flops, I don’t really care? I’m a fan of him but like I don’t really care if his films really flop? I just watch the ones I enjoy. Same can be said about any of my western fav singers. I only care if the content they produce can entertain me. Nothing more.

When you’re in a para social relationship you will spend hours on end discussing and fighting for your favs and their up’s and downs become your whole personality like your life depends on it lol.

A lot of Kpop fans on forums are definitely in para social relationships with their idols. Myself included.

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This, I 100% agree with this.

What parasocial? BP treat blinks like non fans kkkkk

But I think wasting time here is still better than in others sns where your takes can go viral.. better be crazy in secret

But I agree with ISAIDSHESAIDWESAID, if it affects your irl mood then you better rethink.. I never had a fight here or discussion where it ruined my mood so I still have hope

Delulu bg stans and their oppas

Quote from dopiee

That's a good point that I don't see normally talked about in this discussion. People usually limit this discussion for mocking purposes till the BF/GF thing but you're right in a sense. Thinking you own the idols.

Yes, I saw it quite a lot, even in the fandoms I'm in and I never understood it. If I don't like an album or a song, I have a choice not to buy it. Or even if I buy it and don't like it later, I'm not going to suddenly protest or get angry online. And it's just a small example, other cases are much worse.