Do you feel uncomfortable accepting expensive gifts? How did you get over it?

  • A person in my life is the best thing to happen to me but I'd have to take a loan to repay even one of their gifts. I've had my family use the basic needs they've bought over my head so I'm uncomfortable with gifts in general and the price isn't helping here. I can't afford to do the same for them. I do gift them stuff back but ofc some people ignore it to suit their narrative of me.


    Even if I like the gift I won't be able to wear it cuz people's tounges will start wagging. It looks shady even if its innocent and it bothers me a lot. It makes me feel cheap like I can't stand in front of those people even if what their awful minds think isn't what is actually going on.


    Whenever I try to start a conversation it ends before it starts with a why do you care about society. I care cuz this has happened before with another just small gifts like chocolates and watches I tried to be bold about our love. We were basically kids but society and my own family slutshamed me even when nothing physical was going on and I started resenting those gifts. I dunno if its just me being paranoid or them needing to understand these gifts upset me. It makes me feel small that I can't afford stuff in the same range and the thought of what people will say alone is enough to eat up my peace.

    Desbundar

  • you don't want the expensive gifts???


    well send them to selfmate - I have no shame in accepting such expensive gifts :-)


  • you don't want the expensive gifts???


    well send them to selfmate - I have no shame in accepting such expensive gifts :-)


    Haha I wish I could send em right over :D

    Desbundar

  • Haha I wish I could send em right over :D

    let me know how it goes...


    I always say that communication is key no matter what relationships - love, friends, family, workers, strangers, classmates etc etc...


    just talking to people honestly within hopefully a sit down face to face sitting is really useful but sometimes that's not possible in this environment and not everybody (like your mention yourself) is a good talker/thinker/listener so maybe text or online or other methods may be better for you!!!!

  • Oh, I understand you perfectly. I wouldn't say I liked receiving expensive gifts either. It wasn't easy to receive them because I was not in the best financial situation, and I would not be able to offer the same thing in return. But I found a very good solution to this problem: giving gift baskets as a sign of thanks. These are modest and unique gifts that I prefer to give not necessarily as thanks but simply for no reason to improve the day of loved ones. Thus I equate the expensive gifts that I started accepting with these baskets. That was my way of coping.

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