As i was trying to think abt this i realized i've done a bit too many illegal things
wtf
spill 
spill
I cant say most of them 
imma just say i've written/painted in a public wall and have pirated games 
as I was a kid I cursed at the police
so there was a rascist police officer who didn't belived that my white part of the family was realated with me and said my mom has to show them papers that make really sure that I am her son
I than just said stuff like "fuck you, she is my mom you stupid coward" and well ... I was too young to be fined so they fined my mom for that I was calling the police some rude words and my dad was just confused as heck
I've emulated (pirated) pokemon heartgold. It's not my fault nintendo can't re-release their old games
Another one
You can stuff your bags in shops here since nobody expects you to shoplift in a supermarket (but that could happen) and I once forgot to empty my bag fully as I was about to pay and as I was home I realised I took 2 bar of chocolate without paying them with me
oh man. I am the skinniest guy ever and that was like the only time I ever bought chocolate in the like last 3 years
Downloaded a lot of novels illegally...a lot 
as I was a kid I cursed at the police
so there was a rascist police officer who didn't belived that my white part of the family was realated with me and said my mom has to show them papers that make really sure that I am her son
I than just said stuff like "fuck you, she is my mom you stupid coward" and well ... I was too young to be fined so they fined my mom for that I was calling the police some rude words and my dad was just confused as heck
Your mom should have gotten a reward for raising you instead 
Driving 105 mph (169 kph) on a highway where the limit was 70 mph. Which sounds worse than it was - I was way out in the desert and being passed by other cars going 115. 
feels like a setup 
A few years ago I took a postcard, wrote on it and than tried to buy it with a stamp on since the same store who sold it also did a postal service where you give them the letters and they put a stamp on for you 😬
Only went semi-good cause the woman yelled at me for writting on the card before buying it
Nice try FBI
i drove without a license before my driving exam ( for practise)
and then after passing my exam i drove about twice and its been years
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