Goose vs AI : Who can write a better short story?

What I liked about your Story: The Dialogue, You seem to be very good at creating a good dialogue that doesn't seem unnecessary or forced. I also liked the theme and the characters.

What you could improve on: Overall your story feels a little plain. To make it less plain, you could add some inner thoughts from the characters. For this story, it could improve it a lot if you changed the narrator to betty. And remember (I always forget about it): show, don't tell

Quote from HwaGoose

Well... both me and this AI are going to write a story that has these three things "a yellow dress, strawberry ice cream and a butterfly"

I'll write my short story first, and then I'll ask AI to create a story too.

My short story

Strawberry Ice Cream

When is he coming?

I was standing outside the Ice cream shop, waiting for Marcus to arrive. Ahh, how handsome he was. With dark brown eyes that remind me of delicious chocolate, his heart shaped lips that had the colour of strawberries, plump and kissable-

And as soon as I had thought of him, the Butterfly-colony in my stomach arrived. Again.

Ugh, this is so annoying, I'm getting all nervous.

For today, I had put on my favourite dress, that was as yellow as lemon candy - just how I like it. Hopefully I wouldn't ruin it with an Ice cream stain!

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Here I rewrote the first paragraph in the way I would write it. It's obviously not perfect either :) I hope I wasn't too critical, these were just my thoughts on it.

Quote from HwaGoose

Well... both me and this AI are going to write a story that has these three things "a yellow dress, strawberry ice cream and a butterfly"

I'll write my short story first, and then I'll ask AI to create a story too.

My short story

Strawberry Ice Cream

Betty is standing outside the ice cream shop, waiting for Marcus to arrive.

She is feeling pretty in her dress that is as yellow as lemon candy and hopes that he will find her pretty too.

As she thinks about Marcus's face that she finds very handsome, her heart flutters and she feels butterflies in her stomach.

She thinks about his dark chocolate eyes that she loves staring into and his strawberry lips that she would like to kiss.

Then she sees Marcus walking towards her.

Her cheeks turn pink like the roses he gave her last week.

He is wearing a white t-shirt and black jeans.

"Hi Betty." he says with a smile of his strawberry lips.

She smiles back. "Hi"

"Your dress looks pretty."

"Thank you. I like your shirt, is it a new one?"

"No, it's old." he says. "but my jeans are new."

"I like your jeans too."

He puts his hands inside the pockets of his jeans.

"Well..." he says. "shall we go buy ice cream together?"

They go inside he ice cream shop together.

She buys strawberry ice cream, and he buys a mint chocolate one.

Then they go outside the shop, eating their ice cream while feeling the warmth from the sunny weather.

He licks his mint green ice cream, enjoying the taste.

She looks at her pink ice cream, thinking about his lips.

"Does it taste good?" he asks.

"Huh?"

"Do you like your strawberry ice cream?"

"Yes, I like it."

"I like mine too." he says. "Some people say it tastes like toothpaste, but I disagree."

A yellow butterfly flies towards Marcus and lands on his arm.

"That butterfly looks like you, Betty." he says and chuckles.

Her cheeks turn pink like her strawberry ice cream.

"Maybe a little bit." she says.

"I think you look prettier than it."

Her heart flutters.

She walks closer to him.

Her face gets closer to his, she stares into his chocolate eyes.

The butterfly flies away from his arm and starts standing on the wall of the shop.

"I like strawberry ice cream" she says. "but I like you more."

She stares at his lips.

"I like you too." he says before he plants a kiss on her cheek.

His lips feel cold against her cheek.

She likes the touch, but feels disappointed.

He then eats his ice cream and starts chewing on the waffle cone.

She starts eating hers too, which has melted a bit in the sun.

Then he finishes eating his ice cream and the cone.

He leans himself against the wall, watching her still eating her ice cream.

She finishes eating her ice cream.

"I noticed you staring at my lips earlier." he says.

She blushes. "Yes, I did."

"I guess you want to kiss them?"

"Uhm... actually I have wanted to kiss you all day."

He gently places his hand on her cheek as he plants his lips on hers.

She closes her eyes, enjoying the touch of his lips.

She places her hands on his arms.

His lips then let go of hers.

"I like you, my pretty butterfly." he says.

The End

Well... I'm not 100% pleased with my short story.

Sounds like most of the romance stories, I have written.

And now it is the AI's turn.

Let's see if it will write a much better one.

AI's short story

The Yellow Dress

Anna loved her yellow dress. It was a gift from her grandmother, who had sewn it herself. Anna wore it every day, even when it was cold and rainy. She liked how it made her feel cheerful and bright, like a sunflower.

One day, Anna went to the park with her mother. She saw a vendor selling strawberry ice cream, her favorite flavor. She begged her mother to buy her one, and she happily licked the pink scoop on a cone. She felt a tickle on her nose, and looked up to see a butterfly. It was blue and purple, with black spots on its wings. It fluttered around her head, as if curious about her.

Anna smiled and reached out her hand, hoping the butterfly would land on it. But the butterfly flew away, towards the flower garden. Anna followed it, forgetting about her ice cream. She ran across the grass, trying to catch up with the butterfly. She didn’t notice the mud puddle in front of her, until she stepped into it and slipped.

She fell down, splashing mud all over her yellow dress. She felt a cold wetness on her chest, and realized that her ice cream had fallen too. She looked at her dress, stained with brown and pink. She felt tears welling up in her eyes.

She heard her mother calling her name, and saw her running towards her. She hugged her mother and sobbed, “Mommy, I ruined my dress!”

Her mother comforted her and said, “Don’t worry, sweetheart. It’s just a dress. We can wash it and make it clean again.”

“But what if it doesn’t come off?” Anna asked.

“Then we can dye it another color,” her mother said.

“Another color?” Anna repeated.

“Yes, why not? You can choose any color you like. Maybe green, or red, or purple.”

Anna thought about it for a moment. She liked yellow, but she also liked other colors. Maybe she could try something new.

She looked at the butterfly again, still flying around the flowers. It was so beautiful and free. She wondered what it would be like to be a butterfly.

She smiled and said, “Mommy, can we dye my dress blue and purple? Like the butterfly?”

Her mother smiled back and said, “Of course we can. That’s a lovely idea.”

They got up and walked back to the car, holding hands. Anna felt happy again. She didn’t mind the mud or the ice cream anymore. She was excited to see how her dress would look after they dyed it.

She decided that she would wear it again tomorrow, and maybe she would see the butterfly again too.

Well... seems like I wrote a romantic one, while the AI wrote a story that seems like something from a children's book.

I feel like the AI wrote one that is much better than mine.

Even though I could edit my story to be better. (my story was just a first draft)

This thread is so random.

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The AI's one is sooo boring LMAO

Quote from Catgirl

What I liked about your Story: The Dialogue, You seem to be very good at creating a good dialogue that doesn't seem unnecessary or forced. I also liked the theme and the characters.

What you could improve on: Overall your story feels a little plain. To make it less pplain, you could add some inner thoughts from the characters. For this story, it could improve it a lot if you changed the narrator to betty. And remember (I always forget about it): show, don't tell

Here I rewrote the first paragraph in the way I would write it. It's obviously not perfect either :) I hope I wasn't too critical, these were just my thoughts on it.

What do you think?