Being a nugu girl group stan may sound easy, but it’s a lot harder than you’d think. Constantly we fear our favs might disband, and don't know how to fix it. We promote them as much as we can and our favs are extremely talented, but the fandom is small and the company unknown. It is similar to a small business, small and unknown. Today please go to Youtube and listen to a smaller girl group, do your part! Comment if you need recs
Everyday I wake up to my phone buzzing, but no it's not an alarm, it's the hate I receive online for simply defending my favorite girl group from misogynistic boy group stans. I unlock my phone to read news articles regarding my favs, no new news... They have everything people could want, but their company is small so they have little publicity. Once I finish reading the news, I go to get breakfast. While I eat breakfast I read through my messages “Ugly”, “Disgusting”, “Your flop favs deserve to disband”, these messages haunt me 24/7 simply for supporting talented girls. I put my phone away and finish my breakfast.
Once I have finished my breakfast, I go to my zoom classes. People whisper and mock me when I speak, teachers yell at me and taunt me all because I have girl group posters in my room. I try to stand up for myself, but no one listens. My heart erodes like a sand stone on a beach. I try to tell myself “Things will be okay” and put on music to blur out the class. It’s my favorite song, ‘Only You’ by SATURDAY. I suddenly feel at ease and remember my reason for being again.
Once classes finish, I go onto my fan account to promote my favorite group. I see so many hate comments under their posts, telling them they’re not good enough even though they’ve done nothing wrong. I want to tell my favs in that moment that I love them, but how will they know I love them when their sales are so low. I decide to stream their music while I do my homework.
“You’re not a good fan”, “You’ll never get people to love your favs”, “You’re the reason they’re close to disbanding”. My heads filled with these destructive thoughts, the self-hate I must endure every day. “Why do I have to go through this?” I ask to no one in particular, “Why me? I am such a good person”. I quickly clear my head and decide to start getting ready as it is late already. I eat dinner and do my makeup. Why do my makeup so late you might ask? I have a videocall fansign with my favs tonight. I decide to stream their music while I wait for the call.
The clock strikes midnight and I finally begin to wait staring at my phone. It’s only minutes until I receive the call I so look forward to. Suddenly the phone rings and I answer, then I see the person who’s helped me get through my every day. It’s ‘Yuki’ from my favorite girl group SATURDAY. She tells me “Hi! We meet again” and I smile, she is the only person who remembers me. I tell her how much she means to me, and she cheers me up. She tells me to be strong and I tell her I’ll keep loving them. Soon our time together is over, but I’ll always know that SATURDAY will always be there to help me when I’m down. I continue to support them and become a happier person. No matter how much negativity I have in my life, I will always look at the positive, I will always look to SATURDAY, the 5 girls who have helped me find peace within myself.
Thank you, Im Yuki
Saturday have recently had a comeback with the song 'Only You', please give it a listen!