Voluntarily wanting to be a single-parent is selfish and irresponsible!

  • ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

    Most abuse cases happened by parents, but children from a single-parent household are more likely to be victim of abuse

    http://marripedia.org/effects_…s_families_on_crime_rates

  • exactly which means the society one lives in is very determinate of the ways or bet method of raising a child...

    I know, but I’m talking about the western society and there it’s not ideal

  • I know, but I’m talking about the western society and there it’s not ideal

    maybe but it's very hard to test right? lol


    you can't take ceteris parabis conditions or experiment on children to determine how "number and type of parents" factors weigh compared to other social economic factors

  • Honestly this just sounds like you're trying to demonize women who choose to be single parents. Please drop your stats, because I want to see how many of these delinquent children had mothers who specifically chose to be single and got their children via sperm donation

    It doesn’t matter if the mother chooses to be a single parent or if she ended up being a single mother because of circumstances. These are statistics that shows how single parenting had many negative side-effects. Does it really matter how the women got pregnant or in that situation?


    It’s not a ideal situation in our western society. I simply don’t get how you voluntarily willingly decide to have a child in an non-ideal situation, knowing very well you will need the help of others at the end of the day anyway. The same goes with fatherless too. The only reason I mentioned the fatherless part is because of the statistics. It goes both ways. Not just women.


    Hey I’m not saying they shouldn’t go on with their plan. I just think it’s a bit selfish and irresponsible.

  • The article seems to be talking about divorced couples, not voluntary single parenthood via sperm donation.

    Seems? You either read it or not, don’t assume.


    Also most single-mothers never got married. They were either alone since the birth of the child or broke up with the baby daddy.


    https://www.fixfamilycourts.co…e-mother-home-statistics/

  • It doesn’t matter if the mother chooses to be a single parent or if she ended up being a single mother because of circumstances. These are statistics that shows how single parenting had many negative side-effects. Does it really matter how the women got pregnant or in that situation?

    It matters yes, because the two situations are wholly different and this thread is not about divorced couples.

  • Seems? You either read it or not, don’t assume.


    Also most single-mothers never got married. They were either alone since the birth of the child or broke up with the baby daddy.


    https://www.fixfamilycourts.co…e-mother-home-statistics/

    marriage doesn't change anything, and I did read it and that is what its about. Choose studies that actually fit what you're trying to prove. you're the one making assumptions about sperm donor using single mothers based on an article about broken up couples.

  • maybe but it's very hard to test right? lol


    you can't take ceteris parabis conditions or experiment on children to determine how "number and type of parents" factors weigh compared to other social economic factors

    No you can’t really do that.

    But I think the statistics we have at least for now shows that one isn’t the ideal number.

  • marriage doesn't change anything, and I did read it and that is what its about. Choose studies that actually fit what you're trying to prove. you're the one making assumptions about sperm donor using single mothers based on an article about broken up couples.

    Ok I think we are talking pass each other now. The studies are proving my point. I think you believe a middle class woman who voluntarily wants a child without wanting a father for it will have a different outcome than women who got a child without a father because of other circumstances.

  • No you can’t really do that.

    But I think the statistics we have at least for now shows that one isn’t the ideal number.

    i mean the statistics can only show each parent based on their current circumstances which is a problem in testing social experiments and social problems because of the lack of control factors...


    in the idea situation you have have same age parent v same age parents, same upbringing and social economic factors, same family (or no family support systems) etc etc but that's all too hard to standardize...I'm not sure whether the statistics you have have controlled for all factors possible but i guess it's the best ones we've got...

  • i mean the statistics can only show each parent based on their current circumstances which is a problem in testing social experiments and social problems because of the lack of control factors...


    in the idea situation you have have same age parent v same age parents, same upbringing and social economic factors, same family (or no family support systems) etc etc but that's all too hard to standardize...I'm not sure whether the statistics you have have controlled for all factors possible but i guess it's the best ones we've got...

    It’s the best ones we’ve got. Several studies by different institutions under different circumstances. Yet they always came to similar conclusions.


    With this we can say that one or two factors (circumstances) are at least a very significant trigger for several negative outcomes that can even lead to others social economic factors. For example, you can’t work full-time anymore, means your income decreases while your expenditure is increasing ( because of the child.)

  • I do agree with you. A child was created with two parents and should be raised by two parents. Even if a woman has the emotional and financial means in which to raise that child, it is selfish and disadvantageous to the child’s welfare especially with some celebrities. My daughter is lucky, she has two parents and has had every she could want and I’ve always put her first, I still kinda do even at 18.

  • I disagree. Some women want to experience motherhood but because of circumstances, they might not want a man in their life. I don't think it's wrong of them to do it.

    If people expected themselves to be in an ideal situation in order to have children, then we would have only the 1/10 of the children that are born now.


    A family with both parents will guarantee neither emotional nor financial stability to a child. Both parents might have to work to make ends meet and the child might be neglected in that case too.

    And in a lot of cases, men are not that involved in parenting so women are the ones to pull the most work.

  • As long as you’re well prepared and don’t just do it on a whim I don’t see a problem with it. I also don’t think the statistic op keeps bringing up really applies here. The children from single parent homes with higher odds of becoming delinquents probably has more to do with those homes being generally unstable and financially insecure. These single mothers ended up in a situation they weren’t prepared for and unintentionally forced into. The woman looking for sperm donors are on the opposite end of the scale. They really have a chance to plan, consider and make sure everything is ready for a child.

  • there are plenty of people who shouldn’t be parents in the world, what’s one more?


    it would be better if people would adopt but sometimes the children available have deep seated issues and behavioral complexities that can overwhelm new parents.


    it’s a harsh world where the rules are no longer black or white. just bc a parent is a single parent doesn’t mean they will be bad or even guarantee they will be able to be a good parent. sometimes single parents have access to resources traditional nuclear parents don’t have: money, community, physical environment, educational opportunities, etc.


    many parents don’t plan to be and it’s not in my nature to try to control someone’s natural desire to foster their own family unit anyway. let people do what they’re going to do as long as it’s not actively malicious.

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