How do you'll deal with "edgy" people?

I wasn't feeling well so a colleuge noticed and struck a conversation with me for hours. Thats super sweet but I wanted to sleep. Its just minor "ikw whats better for you so we are going to do what I say" kinda behaviour. They are nice in general and are going through some stuff. However they talk for hours about how they are not politically correct and like offensive memes. They haven't showed me anything explicit but yeah some of it is not something you'd show your colleuge. Their jokes are mostly having a super weird take and then acting like they were the only one bold enough to say it. I used to have a specimen like this in my old office but I was confident I could whoop his ass need be cuz he was my size. This colleuges a tall strong giant and seems a bit...volatile despite saying that I can be open with them. I can already sense it. I told them I don't like them making jokes. He gave me a lecture on how I shouldn't be so sensitive. The less I acknowledged their jokes the meaner they got. They are a nice person in general and I want to be there for them but yeah I just don't like this side of them.

Quote from YouChanDoThis

Communication and honesty are important. Tell him pretty much everything that you said here (that you feel comfortable telling him). The sooner the better. If you don't, it could lead to built up feelings and that's generally not something I would advise. I'd try my best to still be respectful though obviously and tell him that you see where he is coming from and you respect that, plus you know he's been having a rough time, but you really don't want to talk about that sort of stuff with him.

Thank you channie! Exactly its better to sort it out at first before the resentment builds up and I can't look at them the same way again...

Quote from YouChanDoThis

No problem! I agree. If they're a kind person like you say they are, hopefully they'll respect that. Maybe if you have another co-worker with similar beliefs to him, you could direct the two of them in the direction of each other, so they can vent to each other about those things.

He sits next to a super sorted married colleuge of two kids perhaps I can start inviting her to join in! She has a lot more life expirience than me and can be a good influence!

Quote from common-nobody

well i believe no one's 100% good or bad, so he's probably not a totally mean guy and considering how he tried helping you it seems that he has good intentions

the thing is that relationships are built on communication and healthy discussion, and it's not happening here. he got upset when you expressed discomfort about his jokes, he calls you sensitive when you try talking to him, and he doesn't make you feel safe, which is the last thing you want when opening up to someone

he can't expect something that he won't give back. if you listen to him without judgement or silencing, then he should do the same

maybe he has trouble communicating, or he's one of those guys jumping on the "politically offensive" bandwagon, but that's not your responsibility to deal with. helping someone with personal problems is a whole process, and it should be uplifting for both parties, not just one

idk how long you've been talking, but i agree with YouChanDoThis and think you could tell him everything you wrote in the OP (respectfully), and stop talking to him if he doesn't reciprocate or listen to what you have to say

hope this helped a bit..

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Wow. Thank you so much! Yes it helped A LOT! It changed my whole perspective on the situation.

superyeah you can actually close this thread. I've got my answer

Quote from YouChanDoThis

Sounds like a great idea! I think she will be.

I'm so glad you found your answer. Good luck!

Thank you chan