Are you guys close to your extended family? aunts, uncles , cousines?
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That’s what basically happened to one of aunts. She’s the eldest of my mums side so she would be made to do the manual labour tasks at home like cooking cutting cleaning etc. Basically typical jobs girls were made to do. She wasn’t allowed to go to school either as it wasn’t a girls role to get an education.
She was married off to a decently well off man back home (would still be considered poor by richer counties standards) and one of the first things he did for her was to get her a job so they’d have double income. Her family was ballistic, if she could get a job so easily then why didn’t she earn money while she lived with them? To make up for it she should send money them. She complied. So a girl who was prevented from school and work is being guilt tripped because she got a job now. My aunt knew what is like to live like this so she never held a grudge against my mum (2nd oldest sister) or us unlike some of the younger members of their family like their brothers, those guys are trash. Aunt still keeps in contact with us but barely talks to family back home.
My mum is basically an outcast because she didn’t send much money home when she was married off because my dad simply couldn’t take care of 3 families (his, hers and me).
It’s sad how sometimes severe poverty can affect peoples lives. Had they not been so poor mum and aunt could’ve possibly gone to school and gotten a job or land a richer husband so they could’ve looked after their family better. But still that shouldn’t excuse treating others like crap for things outside their control.
Oh man that's a whole load of things
My mom's family are pretty well off just entitled AF
Like her sister wouldn't understand why my mom would buy me and my brother sth but not her kids
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Not really. Most of my cousins have their own families now. They live abroad or really far away, so I only see them maybe once a year (some I haven't seen in years because of the pandemic). I even have family members that I haven't even met.
No drama or anything like that. Except for the problematic husband of my aunt, but we don't talk to him.
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Yes, it's a custom here to be close with your extended families. I live in India
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Not really or better said no more to some
The thing is as I was a small kid my mom constantly visited everyone and forced me to go with her. I saw 1 of my aunts at least all 2 months cause dispite she was living like 200km away she either came to us or we to her. This also why I saw 3 oy my cousins a lot. One of them the most since she was living at her parent's house till she was in the middle of her 20s, the others who were a small bit older less as much cause they moved out of the country. As I was a small kid the older two also stayed at our house for the holidays 2-3 times and I was once in the house of my aunt during the holidays, but we had to cancle after 4 days cause I got a sunburn at the beach cause my aunt gave a fuck about sunscreen and my mom was hella mad and took me back home since my aunt did not even care to help me about my sunburned crusty back-skin... well...
The other aunt and my 2 cousins I saw a few times but not that often. A bit more as I was little but as I was 8 or so not more that much. Later on I saw one of the cousins a bit more since she worked at the dance academy I went to for some years. As my mom turned sick (she has alzheimer) my aunt was there more often to help my mom till my mom had to move out and sell our house
Than there are 3 uncles and 1 aunt aswell as 1 cousin that I barly ever saw in my life. They either live to far away, do not care about the family that much or it just never happend to be at the same place that much. One of the uncles I met him a few times as I was little, mostly when he wanted to show me his pets (he had turtles, a snake and some cats). The other uncle came a few times around and we once visited him in the city he lives in (wich is 300km away from where I used to grow up) but really I didn't spoke too much with these people.
Than there are people who claim to be family but are not (!) they never cared and just once wrote a letter to me and my grandma. My grandma said she was so confused as the letter came in and said "If they really were our family than they could've showed up earlier and not like after 20-25 years... what do such people think they are?" and since the realation is more based towards my dad, he either never spoke up about it or just said he does not care. Also what I mean is after he and my mom got divorced he had a new girlfriend who allready had kids as they begun dating. They moved into a house with me and lived there for like 1 year before they broke up and since she seems to not know or don't wants to know the father of her youngest daughter she randomly came up saying my dad would be her daughter's dad so after more than 20 years that girl wrote letters to me and my grandma pretending she was my grandma's grandchild and my sister wich she don't even is. This girl wrote like 3-4 letters and even pretended the dumbest things like someone told her I never contacted her cause I would hate her. I wrote back in a letter that I can't hate someone who I don't even know exists or where I just knew as "child of the ex. of my father" so basicly if the kids of the ex of your father are not his kids than depending on how the realation went you will never see these kids again and move on with your life and so I never cared. My dad himself also allways just said around my grandma that I was the only child he ever had. My grandma said it was very suspicious since she said my dad introduced the woman as his new girlfriend back 20+ years ago as she allready had her kids so she was super confused about the letters and yeah I would've been too if I know that the person claims thinks that are not true.
Further away my grandma dad's side has 13 siblings. I most likly met in total 3 or 4 of them. All I know is that one of her sisters has 1 daughter that I met once as I was a small child. I remember that my grandma's niece was into skateboards and my grandma also said once some years ago that her niece would've came out as lesbian and moved in with her girlfriend. Than there is the sister of my grandma that she allways takes around everywhere when my grandma has to do a long travle in the car cause she thinks she can't travle alone anymore. I met said sister of my grandma cause of the car-travle situation a few times allready before. Not sure about any other sibling of my grandma, except that wich is weird my grandma and her sister sat in my livingroom 1 or so year ago and than my grandma's sister said out of the blue: "It took me 20 years but now I wonder: is the husband of our youngest sister a cousin?" o.o
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