So in the mix of spam/bot posts in this forum, it seems to be a handful of people deleting there posts after some time before people are able to comment on them. (Possible Trigger Warning)
Although I may not be the best person for advice and I don't want to seem like a know it all, I feel like based on my own experiences (TW: after trying to take my own life last month at 21) I personally believe I can understand where you are coming from and the current state of mind you are in.
Yes I am aware we truly don't know people on the internet and its rude to but into other people's lives okay?, I totally totally get that but at the same time based on my experience I can also stand at the view point for those who don't have the best relationships with their parents or guardian.
Something I personally wished I did sooner was try to build on these relationships in order to feel comfortable telling them what's going on in your life. It maybe privileged for me to say (and I fully realize that) but the more you give yourself time to realize that things happen that aren't your fault, there is also things not in your control either. But that shouldn't mean you have to suffer alone in your life.
Trust me, my parents and I were NOT close when I was a kid cause of trauma and other stuff, but as I got older and I was more open to them about the mental health support I needed we got closer. I know it may not be the same for you but I hope you consider and realize your value as a person. You deserve so much more credit then what you give yourself.
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Today OOO is having a comeback, something I noticed in the video's description oddly seemed to help me so I will leave that here.
"Just because there’s light doesn’t mean there’s also hope.
Seoul is the city of brilliant lights. Underneath those lights, there are also young people who’ve been hurt by others and who are wandering along the dotted line of lostness. The new album of OnlyOneOf, who has come back as a group after a year, is named “seOul cOllectiOn” for a reason.
The 6 members have sung the dreams and hopes of young minorities by presenting “undergrOund idOl,” the diary of the youths, one after another last year. The reason stories are woven together with the voices of all 6 members this time is that the album captures the stories of Seoul’s loneliness and solitude, and those who are hurt in this city.
The title track “seOul drift” starts the engine of the song with a car exhaust sound-synthesizer line and races forward. The loneliness and wandering aren’t painted with silent darkness. Rather, they are sped up to the verge of hallucination and to their very limit. They are raced to the extent that they can no longer keep up and get exhausted. This song of Leftfield bass genre puts together Seoul’s glamorous lights and the dark reality on the city’s other side as music.
Seoul is now one of the most prominent cities in the world. K-pop has also become a genre that not only Koreans listen to. Everything in this city has become more glamorous and bustling, but that doesn’t mean everyone is happy.
OnlyOneOf always sings about loneliness and pain or the stories of those whose love isn’t blessed. We often simply brush them off as something minor, but they are stories that someone should caress and embrace.
OnlyOneOf hopes that there will be unknown gods’ blessings in these difficult steps being taken, and that there will be blessings from our fans whom we appreciate and whose names you may not know.
불빛이 보인다고 희망이 있는 것은 아니다.
화려한 불빛의 도시 서울. 그곳 불빛 아래에는 타인에게 상처받고, 방황의 점선을 따라 방랑하는 젊은이들도 살고 있다. 온리원오브가 1년 만의 완전체 새 앨범의 이름을 ‘seOul cOllectiOn’라고 정한 데에는 그 이유가 있다.
작년 한 해 숨돌릴 틈도 없이 내달려왔던 청춘의 일기장 ‘undergrOund idOl’을 내 보이며 마이너한 젊은이들의 꿈과 희망을 노래했던 이들이, 6명 전부의 목소리를 겹쳐 이야기를 직조한 것은 서울의 외로움과 고독. 이곳에서 상처 받은 이야기를 담았기 때문이다.
타이틀곡 ‘seOul drift’는 자동차 배기음 신디사이저 라인을 시작으로 음악에 시동을 걸고 질주한다. 외로움과 방황이 정적인 어둠으로 그려지는 것이 아니라 환각에 가까울 정도로 속도를 걸고, 자신의 한계에 끝까지 다다르게 달려본다. 더이상 지쳐 힘이 나지 않을 때까지 달려본다. 레프트필드 베이스 장르의 곡으로 서울의 화려한 불빛과 그 이면의 다크 한 실상을 음악에 접합했다.
서울이라는 도시는 이제 전 세계 중에 손꼽히는 도시이다. K-POP이라는 장르도 비단 한국인들만 듣는 장르가 아닌 게 되었고 이 곳의 모든 것이 화려해지고 숨 가빠졌다. 그렇다고 모두가 행복한 것은 아니다.
온리원오브가 늘 주제로 삼고 있는 외로움과 상처 혹은 축복받지 못한 사랑을 하고 있는 사람들의 이야기들. 우리는 그것을 쉽게 마이너하다고 얘기하지만 누군가는 보듬어주어야 할 이야기들.
온리원오브의 그 어려운 발걸음에 이름 모를 신들의 가호가 있기를.
이름 모를 고마운 팬들의 가호가 있기를.
