Posts by myheartminkyu


    every time i interact with people around here they are extremely unreasonable and combative for no reason at all over some shit that is extremely trivial and also has nothing to do with them. what is wrong with you?

    something is wrong with you

    so i will be leaving now and not returning

    good luck with your community and your war on other people's sexualities

    You think that sexy means "who do you want to sleep with" and that's not what it means. Being attracted to someone and sexy are also different things. Sexy is vibe, attitude, aura... You can be conventionally pretty but not sexy (most of the kpop idols if I'm being honest), you can be avarage looking and be extremely sexy. I can list you at 10 random people i find sexy. Do i want to sleep with them? No. Gay men can find women sexy, straight girls can find women sexy, lesbians can find men sexy... Etc.


    quark12395 jaebeom is hot af. Imo he and jungkook are the sexiest male idols, they ooze sex appeal.

    And no, i don't want to sleep with them lol

    i dont get why you all keep trying to teach me my own sex drive. i'm the one who has been me for my whole lifetime, not you. therefore i will tell you what i mean by what i say

    its not that "i think that's what it means" that IS what it means. TO ME

    personally i dont really care what it means to other people. it doesnt affect my life. they can do whatever they want

    i dont CARE what other people want to do. i promise you i dont


    "Gay men can find women sexy, straight girls can find women sexy, lesbians can find men sexy... Etc." AND? I've never experienced any of that and I never will so its 100% irrelevant to me. you might as well be telling me that cake grows on trees at night on another planet. what am i supposed to do with this information? it has nothing to do with me and my daily existence.


    when i speak i'm not defining sexuality for the whole world, i'm just sharing with you what mine is and its really insulting that you all are judgmental and demeaning. you dont like how i feel or see things? ok. i get that. but you cant say its "wrong" and i'm "mistaken." this is how i am. you can accept it or...well thats actually your only choice.


    i used to convince myself that i dont want to sleep with every hot man i see but eventually i realized that I DO. I absolutely do, and as soon as i accepted it, life got better for me. i think i was guilt tripped by christian parents into thinking that wanting sex with sexy men is wrong or whorish or something. and thats why i told myself i dont want to. but the truth is, i do. every time i see a hot guy i want him pull my hair and spit in my mouth. i'm not gonna lie and say i dont because it would make other people happier for some odd reason. its my life, it needs to reflect my wishes not yours.


    i aint gonna live forever, ok? so when i see a good opportunity i'm gonna pounce. there are not a lot of enjoyable things in life and sex with hot guys tops the list. yes i wanna bang every hottie. yes i want to eat all the ice cream. yes i want to spend all the money. yes i want to own all the shoes. yes i want to scratch all the lotto tickets. ALL OF THEM. i do and i'm not sorry. i'm greedy. i want a lot of good experiences. i want to die without regrets. holding onto some vagina aint gonna win me any awards. i'm not gonna get a medal for it after i die. its just gonna dry up unused. what a waste.


    you can do you. i'll never be the one to stop you or try to convince you that its "wrong"

    stop telling me what other people do, think, and want. i dont care what other people want. it makes no difference to me. go do whatever you want

    oh youre right. youre so right. i have seen these people a lot and i know its true. they have cuteness with a touch of sexy in it and sexy with a cuteness to it. its not easy to do but they pull it off

    its like they're cinnamon rolls but they have a little extra spice or in kai/taemin's case they're insanely hot but have unexpected cinnamon roll insides. you expect them to be a certain way but they hit you with cuteness


    oh thank you as well. i may not always understand experience that i have never had but i think you got me to understand it, and for that i thank you.


    sleep well! :sleepyr: ttyl :-)

    well i didn't say that it means that to everyone. i said it means that to me, and that is what it means

    i'm sorry that you feel that that's trolling, but thats literally my life. in high school i was only attracted to maybe 5 guys in all 4 years. so if not them who WOULD i have been sexually attracted to? a potted plant? a chandelier? I mean, i dont get whats so confusing about this

    i liked the same guy for two years before i got him to go out with me. i hit on the same hot coworer for 8 months before i got him to go out with me. i dont just see hot guys all the time. its rare. if i dont get them, who am i gonna get? Like what do you imagine my other options for a sex life are, if its not with men i find attractive?

    right so you at least understand then that other people have different tastes and perspectives...some of which might not related to physical features at all...

    such as wealth - you can at least understand how some women (maybe not you)can find attractiveness in wealth

    oh boy, you hit a nail on the head

    thinking back....these dudes who were 3's had money, good jobs, college educations

    you figured it out. they never admitted to me that their motivation was monetary but looking at it now....it clearly was and is with at least half the people they date. they want a husband who can provide a certain lifestyle. THAT is the attraction for them

    so yes, thats a form of attraction that is not sexual. i just have not experienced it. i always thought i would be making my own money. i thought this as a kid. i thought i wanted to get married but i didnt want to be broke if my husband left me. so i would have to be able to make over 150k by myself and whatever he makes is irrelevant because he could honestly leave at any time

    but the women i know and am related to envision a future where they are at least somewhat taken care of by a man

    i definately understand where you are coming from i was merely trying to get you to see that in your opinion and experience sexy = attractive and vice versa

    but because that statement doesn't hold true for all situations for other people therefore there must be a difference in the meaning of such words

    but nevertheless it doesn't impact you or the way you see things so its probably moot...

    but in relation to the part i bolded even if you can imagine that scenario you can at least understand why other people might have a different perspective and consider other things which are attractive qualities but arent sexy related


    now that you mention it, i have seen people have sexual and romantic attraction to people who aren't handsome. my friends and female relatives have dated some busted ass dudes and when i asked them WTF they could not explain it. but they fell in love with these men. after it was over they saw the men the way i had been seeing them the whole time. they were like "ew he is so ugly, he looks like a fried lizard" and i was just like "welcome to my world, he's always been ugly, wtf is wrong with your eyes?"

    its like the positive feelings they had for the person created a unrealistic view of their appearance. but they've never been able to tell me what they saw in these guys. my sister is a solid 8 but she will date a 3 and tell me he looks like brad pitt. no honey, he doesnt.

    i just feel like other women want to be liked so badly that when any man without a criminal record expresses interest in them they feel that their worth as a woman depends on getting him to like her and commit to her. because if she cant do that she's not pretty enough. she's not feminine enough. she's not worthwhile enough.

    for me i dont care about any of that. i'm not out here trying to prove myself to the world. i only care about having what i want and not being inconvenienced. spending a lot of time with someone that's not hot? thats a drag. if i dont even want to be near him dating is pointless. so when i want to date the first thing i do is find myself the hottest creature i can possibly scrounge up and then i take it from there.

    if i have a handsome friend, yes i want to get with it. i will be scheming the whole time to get him to date me, and yes i've done it before. i cant always do it and when i cant its sad, but of course im gonna at least try.

    my whole goal in life is to have a nice job and a hot husband. if i let hotties escape who am I?

    ahh okay, so you don't look at someone cute and think oh they're attractive? just for people who are sexy? its like sexy= attractive okay i get it

    to me its the same thing. if i see a cute man i'm already attracted and yes its sexual

    i have never met a cute man that i wouldn't hook up with. unless he was married or something. then it wouldn't be that i'm not attracted it would be that's he's taken and therefore off limits

    but i dont meet cute guys and do nothing with them. why would i do that? if i'm out and i see a cute guy, if i feel confdient that day i will try to meet him. if i am looking ugly i will just let it go, but if i look presentable i will try to get his attention first and make eye contact to see if he is friendly. or even better, flirty.

    like i was at the bookstore and i saw a cute guy in the manga aisle. well, your girl knows about manga. so i got his attention and asked him about what he was reading. ended up getting those digits

    i saw a cute guy at the store and i made eye contact, he came over, we talked and we had stuff in common then we left and went to eat lunch together

    cute guys are so rare. when i see one i gotta act

    one time i was walking to the corner store and i saw badass asian man. oh my GOD he was insanely hot. he was tall, impeccably dressed, flawless skin, flawless haircut, he had an amazing walk. he smelled fantastic. he looked like a whole ass meal

    the only reason i didnt do anything was because he was walking in front of me crossing the street and i was too far behind. i couldn't do anything without being rude. so i had to let that go. it breaks my heart to this day. i wonder where he is right now? wherever he is, he is hot to death and i still want some :cryingk: it was 2 years ago and i still remember it like it was yesterday

    no thats not what i'm saying at all. i get that other people may feel that way but i've never experienced it. sexy and attractive is synonymous. there is no difference. and both require handsomeness. i have never been sexually attracted to someone who was not handsome. if a man is sexy he is also handsome by my standards. every girl has a look or more than one type of look that she likes. for me i like men who are tall and who have broad shoulders, small waist, long legs. big feet, big hands. I like thin lips, pretty eyes, nice teeth. well groomed, nice hair, sweet puppy eyes, looks strong enough for me to sit upon and well dressed. i prefer very dark eyes and very dark or black hair, so most of them had that but i also like brown hair and blue eyes so a few of them had that. now i know thats a long list, but that is what i like. i have not found that impossible to get even though it can be rare. I guess even though I'm not pretty I have SOMETHING men like, even though I don't know what it is. So even if I go on a dating app, I can find men who are tall and good looking. The last man i dated was 6'3 with ice blue eyes. he was fine as hell and he had tattoos.


    in all my life i have never been sexually attracted to someone who did not have killer visuals. all my exes were freaking HOT. (except the ones i dated because other people guilt tripped me into doing it. i didnt think they were hot and it didnt work out and i didnt enjoy it at all) when i would go out with my exes people would say "youre both gorgeous. youre such a good looking couple" and i knew he was the good looking one not me, but it was nice to be included. lmao


    i cant imagine the scenario you're talking about where i meet a guy who is short and portly with a receding hairline big lips, tiny beady eyes, and a slightly rumpled appearance but through some other quality he somehow made me feel sexually aroused. that shit just dont occur :teeheek: unless i've had a psychotic break or my contacts fell out and i cant see the hot mess that is his face, he has NO chance. :fingerk:

    i think he means sexy doesn't necessarily mean ur attracted to them or vice versa.. just saying so don't take me too seriously

    he said that but it does mean that to me

    so then he said, no youre choosing the wrong words. i'm not. sexy does mean attractive. attractive does mean sexy. its the same thing.

    if i am at the drugstore and i see a man that is attractive i want to hook up. i dont understand the experience of seeing someone attractive and not wanting to be physical with them. or seeing someone you find sexy but not being attracted to them. i dont have those experiences. i have never experienced that.

    i get that its coming across really weird to some people but.....this is just how i work

    sorry i think you might have misunderstood me...

    i'm not saying your judging other peoples attractiveness is wrong

    i'm saying your mistaking the meaning of the word sexy and attractiveness (imo from our discussion) not ghe outcome of what you actually find to be sexy or attractive...does that make sense?


    no it doesn't make sense because sexy and attractive means the same thing to me. even webster's dictionary says an attractive person is sexually appealing. i dont think i pulled this out of thin air. its a pretty common opinion.

    so i dont know what you think i'm so mistaken about but everything i've said is what i meant and every thing i've said has been pretty simple and basice. we're not talking about something so complex that i'd be mistaken and need guidance from others or help choosing my words. i said exactly what i mean. there was no mistake.

    i dont know what to tell you. i dont know what youre expecting from me right now. an apology? Ok i'm sorry. I dont' know what I need to apologize for, but I'm sorry. So there's thats dealt with and done.


    i think i went off of what i saw when i googled, i didnt intentionally try to make up some idea of what i think men think. my general stance is that i dont really understand how men measure attractiveness, so i googled and i gave a summary of things i saw them saying


    i dont think i misworded my OP. i meant sexy vs cute. i didnt realize it would be difficult or cause debates. in my world of liking guys these are two very distinct things. it may be a lot less so for people who like girls and thats probably why you all are telling me i'm so wrong and using wrong words for everything, or that i mean something else. no i didnt mean something else. I think in future i should limit threads like this to people who like men so as to avoid confusion. i dont really have other experiences. i can only speak about men.


    its just that for me there's a big difference between men who are sexy and men who are cute. its possible to be both but most men lean towards one direction or the other.


    for me a sexy man is one who is strong, powerful, commanding, intense, alluring, bold, and probably somewhat fit and muscular. a cute man is sweet, kind, adorable, looks cuddly, may not be muscular but still has an attractive body type, and he doesn't really have that 'I'm here pay me attention" vibe. Hes kind of lowkey with his hotness but he has a unique appeal that makes you notice him and makes you soft on him. but both of these types of men are also handsome. handsome is a different thing entirely.

    i'm not sure how you can tell me that the way i judge attractiveness is wrong and "conflated." It sounds absured for you to tell me the way i describe the way i experience attraction is wrong and worded wrong. youre not me. you can judge attractiveness your way and i'm not gonna stop you. but i'm not you

    there is no "issue" here at all because who i'm attracted to and why doesn't really pose a problem for you. does it? it doesn't affect your life at all. its not bothering me in my life either because i handle it my way. so what "issue?" are you talking about? there isnt one

    in my world sexy and attractive are synonymous. cute is a specific style of handsome. this is just how it is. its not something to be argued or changed, its just a simple personality trait that should be respected.


    even in websters dictionary it states:

    attractive: (of a person) appealing to look at; sexually alluring.


    so i'm clearly not the only one who sees it this way

    i dont know, i think it depends on the person. some men really dont find anything special about other guys. i can show them cha eun woo and they will say he's average and there's nothing special about him. thats how i feel about girls

    i dont ever see anything worth mentioning. i dont know what to call that, but when a woman is being sexy i would be the last person to notice.

    i can only tell if its VERY in your face. like i watched that g-idle soojin girl dance and i got why men would find that sexy. but it wasn't just her standing there. she was showing talent, flexibility, confidence, strong eye contact, elegance, gracefulness, etc etc. these are things i also find sexy in men. so then i'm able to understand it. but if someone just showed me a picture of her i wouldn't feel anything at all about it


    but when it comes to men on the other hand i'm like a wine taster. i have all kinds of standards, exceptions, preferences, substitutions, etc. being attracted to men is an everyday experience for me. i have an overwhelming amount of feelings about men.

    in my world if someone is sexy i 100% want to sleep with them. i see them and i get this warm feeling all over my body. and other things happen, too, because i want to sleep with them. i definitely dont want to play polo lol i mean it doesn't mean i cant like or appreciate them as a person too, but i definitely am warm for their form. i'd say to me most men are unsexy so when i find a man that i think is sexy its a huge deal. its not a feeling i'd choose to pass on.

    if someone is not sexy i wont sleep with them. period. i tried that. people told me my standards were too high and i had to date dudes that i find ugly because not dating ugly men is 'wrong" and "shallow." so i did that. i dated men who seemed nice and were interested in me but i didn't find good looking. well i found out that if i get in bed with an ugly man nothing works. its a horrible experience. there well be no satisfaction from that. nothing about it feels appealing or enjoyable. so after i found that out i have never again dated a man who i dont think is handsome and sexy.


    i get that other people are probably different, but this is how i work.


    for me, having a good face is a requirement but there are probably a lot of guys who would be happy with most women's appearance if the woman was actually desirable in some way. i'm gonna learn the tools and reel those guys in lol


    as a girl, things like pretty or beautiful don't apply to my dating life and attractive just means sexy. and sexy means handsome with extras

    a guy can be cute and sexy, but a guy cant be cute without being handsome. cute is a subdivision of handsome lol

    i dont expect you to agree, i'm just telling you how i operate and how i judge these things

    i just want to make sure that i know how to be sexy so that the next time i meet a sexy man i can be sure to reel him in, regardless of what i look like that day