The venting/ranting space became kpop related. so, I made this new thread.
I finally decided today that I will quit my job. I will inform my boss tomorrow. I am comfortable with my decision
I just can't function well lately due to anxiety. WFH with engineering work is becoming too much for me. I will take 3 months of to think things over and have a breather.
I am also seeing a psychologist regarding my mental health.
sometimes I'm sitting and doing my own stuff and realize I actually hate my life and haven't really talked to anyone about it in years. I just take a long moment to think about it then go back to what I'm doing. when I think of how the people who said I was important left, all their words ring loud in my head it feels like lies. I feel like a filler, short-term fun to run away from before it gets deep, I can't be more to people, can't be good enough, how long will it take until people catch on to how I'm acting in real life, I get panic attacks thinking all of this. I can't sleep.
I wish I was more like able. I’m trying to become more at ease with who I am, but it’s hard when I want to change everything about me.
sometimes I'm sitting and doing my own stuff and realize I actually hate my life and haven't really talked to anyone about it in years. I just take a long moment to think about it then go back to what I'm doing. when I think of how the people who said I was important left, all their words ring loud in my head it feels like lies. I feel like a filler, short-term fun to run away from before it gets deep, I can't be more to people, can't be good enough, how long will it take until people catch on to how I'm acting in real life, I get panic attacks thinking all of this. I can't sleep.
it's hard. been there before. as much and as often as we tell ourselves we'll be okay alone, it would be nice to have a bit of appreciation from others, you know? i understand that completely. you seem like a thoughtful person based on your words alone. i'm sure many here would be happy to have you as a friend.
it's hard. been there before. as much and as often as we tell ourselves we'll be okay alone, it would be nice to have a bit of appreciation from others, you know? i understand that completely. you seem like a thoughtful person based on your words alone. i'm sure many here would be happy to have you as a friend.
thank you for your response, it really is difficult and it's all we can do to stay afloat sometimes while we walk on our paths ahead. I doubt that honestly but thank you regardless 
Since starting graduate school, I feel useless again. I've never been that comfortable with group projects on top of also having a couple really bad experiences. I feel like I can never say anything because of my introverted personality, so I don't feel fully included during our meetings. I lose confidence in my own knowledge and capabilities in comparison to my group members, so I'm afraid of doing something wrong and hesitate to take initiative. I'm also afraid to ask them for help because I don't want to look stupid and be a burden, but it's a double-edged sword. Then I get paranoid that the others hate me, think I'm just lazy, etc. Even when I try, I feel like I haven't contributed enough.
I don’t want to interact with people anymore. I want to gonto The middle Of nowhere and be isolated. I’m tired of embarrassing myself and being around people that don’t really like me or my company. Everyone is always the same
relatable. maybe one day, you'll find people who are likeminded and will appreciate you. it's hard because everyone has their own lives and everyone sticks with what they're familiar with. you just have to find your own niche one day. once you do, you'll be okay.
I felt like crying right at that point. when you said the way you treated me was like shit. I wish I would've responded, yes it was such a hard time for me. I thought of dying so many times. I still do. if you'd asked me how I was even once, it would've meant the world to me. you'll never know how betrayed I feel, that you act on your worries for everyone else but me. instead, all I could do was smile and make it seem as if I've been just fine. got better, even. just by being me, I become someone people want to erase. and I guess I'm just sorry. that even if I smile over and over, it shows that I'm a deeply unhappy person. I can't hide it better. and that wanting to ask will never happen because somewhere inside you feel guilty. and I'm not trying to drag down anyone with me. I feign happiness and recovery. seeing others unhappy because of me, I'd rather be devastated by myself. who am I when people aren't leaning on me, I don't know anymore. I'm becoming as dark and empty as the thoughts in my head.
God, I hate the 21st Century and its technology 
Don’t have an account yet? Register yourself now and be a part of our community!
