just started a youtube mukbang channel where i break into random people's houses while they're away, raid the fridge and pig out on everything they got in there. got lucky this time because they got leftover Popeye's chicken. that's my favorite. my goal

is to get to a million subscribers before i get caught by the police and spend twenty years in a maximum security prison with a bunch of cold-blooded molesters and murderers. i'm also donating half the revenue i make with the channel to a charity for people with disturbingly uneven haircuts so hopefully a lot of advertisers would approach me so we can work a deal out. well, i gotta go. i think i hear a car running in the driveway. like and subscribe