I don’t like how ultra-femininity is being demonized!

  • I have the feeling that for the sake of feminism, being very feminine is getting more demonized.


    And it’s especially noticeable in today’s movies and series.

    The very feminine girl who cares for their appearance, love pastel colors and activities that are considered more “feminine”, is always portrait as the evil one, or the dumb one or the one who only lives for the male gaze.

    While the smart girl, the one everyone respects, the one with ambitions and the one with some kinda character, is always the “ not like other Girls” one, the tomboy ( who btw always gets the hot guy).


    Which I find highly offensive tho.

    Not is this ultra-feminine= bad (not preferable) but tomboy = feminist Queen, telling women AGAIN how they should be, but it also goes against the ideology that women should be whatever they wanna be, without being judged.


    And this portrayal in the media has consequences. Those who really care about their appearance and love feminine stuff, or even women who are ok with staying at home, often get their motive behind their behavior questioned, especially by other women who call themself “feminist” with claims that they only behave like this to please men. They often see their existence as a harm to the feminist movement. I’m really done with this internalized misogyny.


    I thought it was all about women to have a choice, no matter what and not to judge their choice, yet again.

  • Sociopaths always take advantage of the social trends to dictate to others and get on power trips


    These same people, if they lived in a conservative society they would slutshame or if they lived in a more sexuality liberated society they would prudeshame


    just ignore them and they will lose their power, rather than take them seriously

  • since i am a part of "the male gaze", i can't say anything really about it

    As tomboys were treated in the beginning of the 20th century, i think ultra-feminin women get treated today... Well there is always a difference between cultures and countries but yes.

    The tomboy was earlier the mad woman, that had lost her mind, had no manners and was everything but lovable.

    I think the trend is working against this now, and i hope in a few years society will find a balance where everyone can be whatever they want, astronaut or housewife/houseman

  • The bad thing about ultra feminity is that it often comes with inefficient use of resources, mass consumerism, and increased pollution. If excessive shopping and use of personal care items was removed from ultra feminity, then there would not be a problem.


    For example, I feel guilty just for washing my hair every day. I feel guilty about the pollution and habitat destruction the beauty products I use may cause both in their manufacture and after I'm done with the container.

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  • since i am a part of "the male gaze", i can't say anything really about it

    As tomboys were treated in the beginning of the 20th century, i think ultra-feminin women get treated today... Well there is always a difference between cultures and countries but yes.

    The tomboy was earlier the mad woman, that had lost her mind, had no manners and was everything but lovable.

    I think the trend is working against this now, and i hope in a few years society will find a balance where everyone can be whatever they want, astronaut or housewife/houseman

    The trend is working against it, which was about time, but it shouldn’t be done by demonizing ultra-feminine woman.


    I have the feeling that whenever ever people wanna change a social issue, they just flip the coin and call it a day.

  • The bad thing about ultra feminity is that it often comes with inefficient use of resources, mass consumerism, and increased pollution. If excessive shopping and use of personal care items was removed from ultra feminity, then there would not be a problem.


    For example, I feel guilty just for washing my hair every day. I feel guilty about the pollution and habitat destruction the beauty products I use may cause both in their manufacture and after I'm done with the container.

    Yeah, of course, we are at fault for pollution.......

  • Yeah it's kind of odd to demonize feminity in a feminist context because women should not have to feel like they need to be more like men (not that there isn't anything wrong with a more masculine woman). Just people should be able to embrace whatever interests they like regardless whether they be masculine or feminine.


    A lot of the "not like other girls" trend perpetuates these mindsets since you have young girls thinking they are better for not having feminine interests. Thankfully, that trend got a a lot of pushback recently, so I would like to think we are becoming better at not shaming ultra-feminity and just letting people having whatever kind of feminine or masculine interests they want, but we do have some ways to go.

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  • The trend is working against it, which was about time, but it shouldn’t be done by demonizing ultra-feminine woman.


    I have the feeling that whenever ever people wanna change a social issue, they just flip the coin and call it a day.

    I agree

    Instead of finding a balance they go to the opposite extreme

    I feel like someone voices an imbalance and all humanity knows to do, is to pull on the steering wheel like monkeys...

  • I totally agree. I have a lot of trouble calling myself a feminist because to me, I just want equal pay and for the 'feminine' stereotypes to not be forced upon us. But there are some things that are attached to feminists that I don't agree with. I agree with you and I wish I could speak up more about it but I don't want to be labeled a feminist.

  • Women's interests have always been looked down on and seen as inconsequential.


    It's sad to see women themselves doing it too in the name of feminism 😕

    Instead of owning femininity and everything that is associated with it, like they did with women owning their sexuality, it’s getting looked down. To think you have to be more masculine in order to be respected, is a contradiction to being a feminist.

  • I just wanna add that 'tomboys' shouldn't be called tomboys because they are what they want to be and what they will be. That goes for really feminine girls too. I'm not like that but you are who you are and you matter, weather you wear dresses and makeup or no makeup and 'boy' clothes. I don't care, you matter.


    Everyone should just be themselves but that's hard because I feel like 'tomboys' are 'not the normal' but then 'girly girls' are also 'basic and too feminine'. Please just be yourself and don't label yourself or other people. We are all just humans

  • The trend is working against it, which was about time, but it shouldn’t be done by demonizing ultra-feminine woman.


    I have the feeling that whenever ever people wanna change a social issue, they just flip the coin and call it a day.

    Which is not the way it should be, we should be fighting for equality and love/peace not making more attacks.

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  • I totally agree. I have a lot of trouble calling myself a feminist because to me, I just want equal pay and for the 'feminine' stereotypes to not be forced upon us. But there are some things that are attached to feminists that I don't agree with. I agree with you and I wish I could speak up more about it but I don't want to be labeled a feminist.

    That’s it, no one should be forced on anything. And even if some women fit those stereotypes, let them be.

  • I just wanna add that 'tomboys' shouldn't be called tomboys because they are what they want to be and what they will be. That goes for really feminine girls too. I'm not like that but you are who you are and you matter, weather you wear dresses and makeup or no makeup and 'boy' clothes. I don't care, you matter.


    Everyone should just be themselves but that's hard because I feel like 'tomboys' are 'not the normal' but then 'girly girls' are also 'basic and too feminine'. Please just be yourself and don't label yourself or other people. We are all just humans

    True, I used the word tomboy here cause I think most people will get what I mean by it. But yes, a woman can wear whatever she likes and be interested in whatever she likes, without any labels.

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